How old is too old?

Since a 60-year-old New Jersey woman gave birth to twins recently, lots of people have been talking about how old is too old to have a baby.

Tertia has this post about the topic, and even a survey where so far most of the people have said over 40 is too old.

I am now 42.

I used to think 40 was the cut off because that is when I think it gets hard even for the fertiles to conceive.  To me it seemed like nature's cut off age for women.

But once I tried and tried and failed and failed and lost time after a layoff and lost time trying and lost more time trying with doctors and 40 approached, going beyond 40 didn't seem too old anymore.

Jack was born when I was 40 although he was conceived when I was 39 (and would have been born when I was 39 if he hadn't been frozen for seven months first...)

I did the IVF for the current pregnancy when I was 41 and will be 42 when I give birth.

Now, no doubt, you can see the decline in fertility.  Same protocol for both IVFs. First one yielded 18 eggs and 8 perfect embryos.  Second IVF two years later yielded just 6 eggs and only 5 embryos, not all of them perfect.

Still, it worked with my own eggs.  So I've changed my mind. 40 is not too old.  I'm not sure when too old. Pretty soon I think. But not yet.

Comments

[Artblog]

I think old is when you yourself feel too old.

I personally have no objection to a 40+ having a child but I draw the line at anything over 60 as in those stories one sees in the news every once in a while.

I know we're living longer these days but there is a limit to what a 60 year old can cope with and how long they're likely to live in order to look after that child.

But then again that's just my opinion and people can do what they want and quite clearly do :)

[maggie]

Now, at 46, I think I'm too old - but my babe was conceived and born while I was 42.

[isabel]

NOT TOO OLD. Not to old.

Too old... I have no idea when would be too old. I'm not sure age is the best criteria. A whole range of factors go into it. I just don't want to be the one to decide, ever.

[Eva]

I think this stuff is so relative, it's hard to say. And I'm not sure that age is the primary issue, either. Mostly, I don't feel comfortable with the idea of creating guidelines over who can and cannot procreate.

That said, the over 60 thing makes me uncomfortable, too.

[Natalia]

I would never tell someone else about their life's decision to have a baby; which by the way I WOULD NOT be taking care of. For another woman to tell a woman, she is too old to give birth is cruel and insensitive as women. So, what should my opinion matter? However, I had a conversation with a male friend not too long ago. About the older man/younger woman thing and how men can still create babies til their 80, at least. It's simply an ego thing with them but at the same time; I wish we as women, had the option to do the same without the judgement; especially towards eachother!! If the woman is healthy mentally and physically; and most importantly can financially afford the baby, unlike a lot of these young girls. What is the issue? I'm not too old yet, but if God blessed me one day with another baby; I would embrace the gift...and that's all that matters!!!