One more day?

Paging though a community newspaper today I noticed the listing for a local Unitarian Universalist church. (If I am any religion, I am this one.)  On the Sunday before Halloween, the topic was "One More Day?"  Members and guests were invited to answer the question: "If you could spend one day with someone who is gone, who would it be?"

The service, it says, is focused on helping congregants remember those who have "passed from us. There will be an altar set up to accept pictures or mementos."

Reading this entry made me step back for a moment. I instantly thought of my paternal grandmother -- the first grandparent I lost and the one who I felt still had much to teach me. In the years since she's been gone (Is it 12, 15?) there have been so many questions that I have wanted to ask her. About gardening, about personal organization, about art, about love, about parenthood.  When I am stressed out I sometimes imagine I am walking through her house. I describe every detail to myself, from the quotes pinned to the bulletin board to the way the mugs are lined up on the shelf. It calms me down. That place is a sacred space for me and a sanctuary. Now it is a place that only still exists in my heart and mind.

And then I thought about a dear friend who was in his 30s and drowned while on vacation with his sister's family. We'd been out of touch. I wish I could talk to him again.

And the list goes on.

If you could have one more day with someone who is gone now, who would it be?

Comments

[thalia]

I have to say it would be a tie between my grandmother and our family nanny. I frequently have things I want to tell them, but they've been gone a while now. Although my grandmother had alzheimers, so i'd want her back in her pre-dementia state, not as she was before she died.

I did think about saying I'd want to talk to our baby who didn't make it. But he never got to be a developed human being, so I don't think he counts.

[Aurelia]

My first thought was about my babies too...but, it's not like I could've talked to any of them, since they were too early to make it. So instead, I'm going to slightly alter it, to say I'd like to see what it would be like for just one day with all my *real* and *potential* kids alive. Just how crazy would it be around my house, hmmm?