My IVF Ghost Story

Although David is a native Californian, his dad was not from here.  His dad was from the state where I grew up, Pennsylvania. But unlike me his dad was from a small rural coal town called Tamaqua. When he was in his late teens Bill escaped from that town and joined the Army.

He served in the air corps and did search and rescue. When he retired from the Army, he joined United Airlines and was an engine mechanic there. He still had a sister in Tamaqua though.

So David's dad seemed happy to have a fellow-Pennsylvanian to talk to when I joined the family. He'd tell me about places he'd visited in Philadelphia and ask me if they were still there.  We talked about the Reading Terminal and Connie Mack Stadium in North Philly.  A lot of the places were gone, but it seemed like every time we went over to David's parents house, my father-in-law had another question for me about the status of some Philadelphia landmark or another.

And then just a few years after David and I got married, David's dad died. He understood me better than anyone else in this new family I'd married into and I missed and miss him so much.

Skip forward to about five years later -- about three years ago. After trying to conceive naturally for a year or so and then going to the doctors, finding out what was wrong and then futiley trying one IUI (intrauterine insemination) we were headed down the path to IVF.

David has never produced his contribution in one of those porn rooms at the RE's office.  He prefers to do it at his own pace with his own Internet downloads at home and then rush the sample into the office.

So on the day of our retrieval three years ago another relative dropped me off at the hospital for the retrieval. I went in by myself. I was checked in in a tiny office on the first floor. I was then entrusted to  a senior citizen candy striper, who was charged with escorting me to the right place in the facility.

I don't remember his name. But we got to talking, and it turns out he was from Tamaqua, Pennsylvania. Then he joined the Army and moved away from there. He was in the Army's air corp and did search and rescue. After he retired from the Army he joined United Airlines as an engine mechanic. He had a sister who still lived in Tamaqua though.

I asked him if he knew Bill, my father-in-law. He said yes, he did. But he brushed off the coincidence. He didn’t want to talk about Bill. He wanted to know about different places in Philadelphia and whether they were still there.

His voice and mannerisms were so much like David's dad's it was uncanny. I wanted to stay there and chat with him all day.

But then the nurse -- her name was Sally -- came to get me and prep me for my retrieval, and I never saw that senior candy striper again.

He did escort David in as well, but David was so stressed out about getting his sample to the right place at the right time that he did not chat at all with the candy striper, even though the candy striper tried to tell him things about the conversation he'd had with me about Pennsylvania.

We did get pregnant on that IVF cycle, but the baby was diagnosed with Trisomy 18 -- a condition incompatible with life.  I still think that that baby, our Will, who we named after David's dad, his grandfather, belonged to David's dad and went off to be with him.  Everyone says how much David’s dad loved babies.

Comments

[Aurelia]

Your last paragraph made me cry...